Brother

The reactions of our son or daughter before the arrival of their new little brother or sister can be varied to say the least: some children can feel proud about being the older sibling, others can feel jealous, and there are those that become curious observers of the new situation...

It’s not uncommon to feel a little insecure. How will our first born react? Will they willingly accept that now all of our attention isn't centred on them? Perhaps we even feel bad and a bit anxious thinking that, as well as whether we can cope with another child or not, above all it could come with a complicated case of jealousy.

According to many specialists, such possible cases of jealousy can be avoided in a simple way: by including them in the pregnancy process. This is achieved by allowing them to work together with the parents, for example, by helping to decorate the bedroom of the future brother or sister; talking to them and asking for their opinion about some things; telling them to speak to your tummy or listening to the baby kicking; you can even urge the older sibling to prepare a welcome gift.

In summary: ensuring them that they aren't going to be replaced, but rather that we count on them, that they are a fundamental piece of the family. But you also have to tell them that from now they have new responsibilities: now they are the oldest and they have become an older person.

We, as parents, also have to have patience: it is likely that the older child will ask for our attention or even start behaving like they did when they were young. In this case dialogue is fundamental: you have to make them understand that they are also somebody special, that being an older brother or sister also comes with advantages. You also need to dedicate time to them and to the worries which arise with their new role.

Don't be deceived: there can be some complications, so you have to be comprehensive. However nor must you forget that there is always a solution to any problem, and that this usually comes from experience. In the end the majority of us have been an older or younger brother or sister.


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